your mentor and tormentor

2010-12-24T21:48:00.001-05:00

First blog post with my Mom.

Craaaaaazy Christmas!

2010-11-16T19:29:00.001-05:00

30.

2010-10-18T18:53:00.001-05:00

GO RANGERS!

2010-09-28T18:22:00.001-05:00

AMYKISHEREINTWODAYSYAHOO!

2010-09-22T16:33:00.000-05:00

Tallnut is not pleased.

2010-09-07T20:23:00.001-05:00

Unsuck it? Why, yes.

2010-09-01T19:50:00.000-05:00

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

2010-08-31T07:52:00.000-05:00

Wow. The EMMYs were actually good this year.

Yeah, I know right?

2010-08-26T22:07:00.000-05:00

Effing AYYY - get this man some run support.

2010-08-22T00:32:00.001-05:00

2010-08-19T22:19:00.002-05:00

GUYS

Seriously... don't make it hard for us. Three straight to a possible playoff competitor, then the O's?

There will be fifteen of us there on October 1. Don't muck it up.

2010-08-18T17:03:00.000-05:00

Jeebus.

2010-08-17T20:57:00.002-05:00

Know what's better than the hype, chatter, internet buzz, trailer, pre-screenings, and midnight releases?

If you said the actual movie, you'd be wrong.

2010-08-16T21:56:00.001-05:00

Eli's head exploded tonight... and that's the way the season will go this year.

FANTASY wise, I think MJD is a start move, or maybe AP, or maybe LSD.

Acronyms abound!

2010-08-13T21:18:00.002-05:00

Jersey Shore (10pm)
- 5.505 million viewers
- 3.5/6 HH
- 2.7/8 A18-49
- 4.5/14 W18-34

WAT

2010-07-27T23:11:00.001-05:00

Rangers are EIGHT games up on the Angels right now.

Just want to make sure I can remember this day...

2010-07-08T18:57:00.001-05:00

BIG MOTHER FUCKING BROTHER BITCHES

2010-06-14T18:50:00.001-05:00

The XB360 E3 presentation was incredibly polarizing.

Here's hoping Ninty can pick it up tomorrow. I still can't decide whether they [Nintendo] revived the industry... or killed it.

2010-06-06T13:57:00.001-05:00

2010-05-29T15:31:00.000-05:00

2010-05-15T12:59:00.002-05:00

Betty White hosted SNL on the Saturday before Mother's Day. I had been looking forward to it for a long time, since the Facebook campaign to get her to host was created. The episode was excellent - cameos, classic characters, and the Queen herself.

About a week later, similar Facebook campaigns arose for Betty to host the Oscars, Carol Burnett to host SNL, others to cameo on GLEE; even joke campaigns for Ms. White to help plug up the spewing oil from the BP nightmare.

And that's when it happened. Internet campaigns jumped the shark.

In a way, we got what we deserved. SNL was at its best that night. And Betty White, in all her 88-year-old glory, dazzled the stage.

But we'll never get it again. Your internet campaign to get your favorite whatever onto whatever will never be taken seriously anymore. However awesome, the dream will never come to pass again.

It's nobody's fault really. Not Betty's, or SNL's, or Facebook's, or even the guy who came up with the idea. Guess we should all just enjoy the Dusty Muffins. Everything else from here out is simply shweaty balls.

2010-04-15T19:20:00.001-05:00

Weird Al is in town in July. Matt and I think we should take Jack.

But, as Matt says, it's hard to explain parody to a six-year-old.

2010-03-21T08:11:00.000-05:00

Lousy Smarch weather.

First day of Spring in Texas brings the fifth or sixth snow of the season.

2010-02-28T10:07:00.001-05:00

The only way you could kill a mouse with it-- same as human-- is to drop a bale of it on the subject heavy enough to kill.

2010-02-24T08:41:00.000-05:00

Is it willfully malicious? Or willfull maliciousness?

2010-02-09T12:51:00.000-05:00

“The Grammy voters chose someone who, according to her lyrics, has spent her entire life waiting for phone calls and dreaming about horses and sunsets.”

2010-01-24T03:48:00.002-05:00

PLAY!

* Achievement Unlocked
* Blocky
* Bloons
* Bloons Tower Defense
* Boomshine
* Cursor 10
* Cursor Thief
* Desktop Tower Defense
* Dice Wars
* Domino Pressure
* Double Wires
* Monkey Kick Off
* N
* Nanaca Crash
* Pac-Man
* Pac-Xon
* Ring Mania
* Squares 2
* TG Motocross 2
* Tontie
* Virus 2

2010-01-04T19:07:00.000-05:00

My favorite comment of the year.

The other day, I got pulled over for reckless handsomement; initially, the cop noticed that one of my suaveometers was faulty, but then when he saw my radiant hottitude up close, he made me take a sextalyzer test. It turned out I was over the limit, so he was going to write me a ticket. Rather than have to deal with all that hassle, though, I just said, "Maybe you should take another look at my license," and handed him my wallet. And when he saw that I'd just "happened" to leave a few 8x10 glossy photos peeking out of the top, he gruffly pocketed them and said, "All right. That's all in order, then." And I said, "Maybe that's not ALL that's in order... LAW and order." And then he got all breathy, and I patted my knee like a sexy person does, and what do you think happened next? Reader, I married him.

2009-12-31T11:52:00.000-05:00

2009-12-07T02:23:00.001-05:00

Then we decorated the tree.

And Jack helped.

2009-11-23T18:54:00.003-05:00

Super-stoked about Thanksgiving with the Stevenson family and Fein family.

I'll always be thankful that my parents truly know how to show love to others.

2009-11-09T20:33:00.001-05:00

Four weeks ago I was nervous that my undefeated Giants were playing New Orleans.

Now they're five and four. Why the face??

2009-11-01T10:37:00.000-05:00

Sunday Literati with Amy ROCKS!

2009-10-16T21:46:00.003-05:00

My brother is engaged.

You ever notice how the word "engaged" has the word "gag" in it? Rita Rudner told me that.

My 360 broke. I was telling people that it lasted a year and a half, but looking back at my blog it really only lasted about a year. The new system is a Microsoft Refurb. Maybe they did a better job than Gamestop's Refurb. We'll see.

Mario Party.

Nathan is moving in. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

I'm 3 and 2 in Fantasy Football.

Pot roast on Sunday. Giants play NO... I'm nervous.

I miss Amy K, and Amanda... who else.... Josh and Phil - I bet they're having a blast. Come to think of it, I think high school reunion (10 years) is soon.

I VISITED RITA DURING SCHOOL HOURS, WHILE I WAS DRUNK.

Basement Jaxx has a super new album.

I just met my neighbors and they're awesome. Fathead has the hookup.

I think that's it.

2009-10-08T20:24:00.000-05:00

Chicken. Salmon of the land.

2009-09-29T18:35:00.003-05:00

I don't remember how I got into Basement Jaxx, but I love them.

Somewhere between the release of Rooty and Remedy I heard the song Red Alert in a Coke commercial. I remember that.

I remember this progressive, aggressive, hard BEAT. It was intense and frightening - and that's what drew me to them. Sometimes you hear one of their songs, and it's over before it's started, and you say to yourself "what the fuck did I just experience" over and over again.

Case in point... New Album...

2009-09-26T21:25:00.000-05:00

2009-09-07T01:31:00.002-05:00

2009-09-04T01:44:00.002-05:00

There are so many links I visit that aren't on my interwebs list. I think it's time for an update.

HuffPo
FaceBook
Hulu
TVGuide
GameStop
DiceWars
Nanaca Crash

2009-08-30T20:23:00.000-05:00

Cookie Monster just ate a Daytime Emmy and said "Dis taste better than Latin Grammy"

Guess that's what happens when you're on the CW.

2009-08-21T22:32:00.000-05:00

2009-07-28T19:37:00.002-05:00

I've been listening to Michael for the last month. The best albums in order are:

6. Invincible
5. Bad
4. Off the Wall
3. Dangerous
2. History
1. Thriller

2009-07-14T14:26:00.000-05:00

2009-07-06T19:17:00.003-05:00

Three songs by Michael Jackson that you DON'T KNOW - but should.

3. 2 BAD - This song comes from History Disc 2, and has a fantastic percussion line. The song reminds be of the driving rhythm and synthesized sound we've always come to expect from Michael. His vocals on the song are insane, and the full-on punch-you-in-the-face feeling is rockin. He features the song in the video for "Ghosts" which is below.

2. You Can't Win - From "The Wiz" movie. The song was written for Michael and is not in the original musical. It should be. His voice is so significant in the song with the brilliant trills and sliding notes... not to mention the wonderful characterization that the Scarecrow brings.

1. 2000 Watts - This is the best song Michael ever produced that wasn't released as a single. There is no video. There is no live performance. There is no history. But the song is strong... 2000 watts strong! The best you've never heard without a doubt. Enjoy this fan-made tribute:

2009-06-25T22:50:00.002-05:00

Okay, so this is awesome too.

Don't make me pick five.. or six, or ten or twenty!!

2009-06-25T22:28:00.003-05:00

His best six videos:

6-Black or White
5-The Way You Make Me Feel
4-Scream
3-Remember the Time
2-Billie Jean
1-Thriller

I'm thinking of Mr. Basford right now... I wonder where he is...

2009-06-25T18:37:00.000-05:00

There will never be another Michael Jackson.

2009-06-22T22:05:00.001-05:00

2009-06-20T20:57:00.004-05:00

The first five are from House #1, the second five are from House #2

2009-06-20T15:57:00.001-05:00

2009-06-16T22:53:00.000-05:00

2009-06-12T21:45:00.002-05:00

And I'm living with my Dad.

It's not as weird as I thought it'd be. He has his moments where he lays on the ground cause his legs hurt.. but other than that, he's doing really awesome.

We played Tiger Woods 2010, 1 vs. 100... we looked at YouTube clips together. My Dad's been on a game show, golfed with Alex Trebek, and knew more Name That Tune(s) than I could ever guess.

He'll be here for a while - up to three weeks. I was thinking I would spend more time out of the house than usual while he was here, but now I'm rethinking it.

2009-05-22T10:22:00.001-05:00

IMAGINE IF YOU WILL A DOLPHIN

WEARING A TINY COWBOY HAT

THEN THAT SAME DOLPHIN GIVES BIRTH

TO A SOLID DIAMOND BABY...

THIS IS THE MOST WONDERFUL SONG EVER!!!

MAKES SUSAN BOYLE SEEM LIKE CHER

THIS IS THE MOST WONDERFUL SONG EVER!!

IT CAN MAKE AN EAGLE MAKE LOVE TO A BEAR!!!

2009-05-21T07:16:00.001-05:00

And apparently, after ten years, I still don't know this show at all.

2009-05-20T19:32:00.000-05:00

I have been watching Idol for almost ten years, and I have no idea who is going to win this season.

But if I had to guess...

I'd say...

ADAM.

2009-05-13T16:58:00.001-05:00

2009-04-22T15:29:00.000-05:00

When I was in high school, Vinny took everyone's crap.

Vinny was a tech for most of the productions we had in high school. He would work hours on end to complete set pieces and perfect the sound. He had this wonderfully-disgusting habit of vomiting before each Opening Night. If Vinny didn't spew, there was probably something to worry about.

My junior year, Vinny ventured out. He wanted to act. Nobody gave him any credit for his acting skills, or his perseverance.. but week after week, while the douchebags cast as Angie the Ox didn't show up for rehearsal, Vinny was there. He studied, he filled in, and when we needed him he knew the lines, he knew the blocking. He just wanted a chance. Instead of giving him that chance - and despite the irresponsibility of said douchebage - the directors decided to keep the cast in place.

The most vivid memory I have of high school occurs now.

I'm on stage. It's the opening performance for the show.. and this wasn't just ANY performance. At my school, we previewed the first act of a new show (in this case, Guys & Dolls) for students on Wednesday (and opened the show on Thursday) to drive sales of tickets. In reality, our classmates simply wanted a way out of class for an hour.. and our teachers wanted an excuse not to teach.

Anywho, I'm on stage. The whole school is in the audience. I'm reciting my lines and give the cue for Angie the Ox. But there's no Angie the Ox.

I look to the wings, and both actors (mind you, the show was double cast) were nowhere to be seen. What I did see, though, was Vinny. He wasn't in panic mode cause he'd already thrown up. He was in hero mode.

I'll never forget looking over to the wings and seeing him there. It was a moment with such quiet innocence, yet Vinny still... somehow... just knew. He knew I needed him, and I couldn't yell his name.. but he came anyway. He saw how we were struggling on stage. I gave the line.. I couldn't do anything else. Vinny knew the cue, he knew the blocking. So he did it - he saved us.

Without a beat, Vinny walked onto the stage assuming the role. The moment he joined me on stage, I treated him as if he always had the part. He did everything right. He got every line right. He was perfect. Soon after that performance, the douchebags were canned and Vinny had the part.

I haven't blogged in a long time, but that was well worth it..

2009-04-10T19:35:00.001-05:00

SOAP!

Soap is TEH AWESOME! :)

2009-03-30T17:56:00.002-05:00

I wanna be on Cash Cab.

That is all.

2009-03-17T21:47:00.002-05:00

Oh, and Boston Legal would be on WIN.

FTW! - Oh, I think I just came up with another slogan!

2009-03-16T13:22:00.000-05:00

I have an idea for a new cable network.

Watch It Now - the channel completely devoted to procedural shows. You never have to watch more than one episode to be satisfied. "With Watch It Now - you always WIN." - Get it???

No, seriously, buy episodes of Law & Order SVU, CSI: DQ, The Simpsons (which has NEVER aired on cable and nobody can explain why), Cheers, America's Funniest Home Videos... Hell, you could even air Mr. Show and it'd still be relevant today.

I think what I'm trying to say is... WHY THE HELL ISN'T THE SIMPSONS ON CABLE? FX? Hello? Maybe TBS? You're airing Family Guy three hours a week!

Someone save the Simpsons.

That is all.

2009-03-14T21:09:00.000-05:00

Why the (insert every single curse word here) haven't I watched Boston Legal before?

Also...

Peggle is so fascinating. Guys who are stuck in their Halo/Call of Duty/Gears of War world are losing their girlfriends to Peggle every day. They're going down like flies.

Maybe if they realized how (insert every single curse word here)-ing awesome it was, they'd get off their ass and pick it up themselves.

2009-03-05T19:28:00.002-05:00

So, I haven't posted in a month. And a HELL of a lot has happened.

2009-01-29T19:06:00.001-05:00

Detroit is depressing.

2009-01-22T19:22:00.003-05:00

Hoo-boy! I got hit with a wicked little virus the other day.

Whenever I did Google search (or Yahoo!, or MSN) the results looked normal, but were all redirected to spyware sites. I had a hard time searching for information on the issue with all the search engines against me.

Luckily, Richard was there too... so, yeah.. dodged a bullet on that one. Now is not the time for spending money on a new computer!

2009-01-18T11:39:00.001-05:00

Jack played XBOX for about 2 hours tonight, then DS for a little while, then some more XBOX.

He's cooler than you.

2009-01-12T08:30:00.002-05:00

Well, the Giants season is over. They played horribly against the Eagles on Sunday. And I thought the game started at 3:00, so I missed the first half.

I'll be rooting for the Steelers and Eagles - it'd be cool to see two psychotic Pennsylvania football cities go nuts.

2009-01-07T18:41:00.002-05:00

Three horrible days of work in a row still can't get me to hate this job.

2009-01-02T22:43:00.002-05:00

Let's briefly discuss first person shooters.

THEY SUCK.

Let's explain.

There are basically two game mechanics to an FPS: Explore and Shoot.

I dislike exploration in my games, because I want a linear story. I want to be told - or at the very least DIRECTED - what to do. I don't want to go hunting. I want to play.

Second, shooting. I used to have this thing against guns in games. It wasn't about the violence, it was about the gameplay. It's all the same. Point, shoot. Point, shoot. POINT SHOOT. I WISH THERE WAS SOMETHING ELSE TO DO.

But there's not. You can give me the smartest story I've ever seen, surrounded by the most fantastic visuals my eyes will ever catch a glimpse of... but then you also give me the same... you explore, you point, you shoot. Over and over. AND OVER.

Sorry, BioShock - but you're just like the rest of 'em.

2008-12-27T14:02:00.001-05:00

Merry Everything to Everyone!

2008-12-22T00:46:00.001-05:00

It's official - I'm pee-pee! :)

2008-12-19T08:52:00.001-05:00

The Toilet Bowl is this weekend. Who will be Number One? Who will be Number Two?

I will be pee-pee.

2008-12-16T08:36:00.000-05:00

Gotta go to work, gotta go to work, gotta go to work, gotta go to wooooorrrk.

2008-12-11T21:00:00.001-05:00

Two million.

That's how many Wii consoles Nintendo sold last month.

TWO FREAKING MILLION.

2008-12-10T18:43:00.002-05:00

So, DeAngelo Williams had another awesome game (30 points!!) - which means I play Rico in the next round.

Deal: He wins - I buy him Ticket to Ride. I win - He buys me the third expansion pack for Ticket to Ride.

See? I am a points whore.

2008-12-07T19:34:00.003-05:00

This was a CRAZY football day. Giants lost, Dallas (almost won) lost, and my Fantasy Football team went to shit. Unless DeAngelo Williams has an amazing game on Monday, my season is over.

ALSO. Prince of Persia is fantastic. The reviews I've read - which I didn't read until I'd played through halfway through the game - say that the game is too easy.

In the last few years, I've realized that I'm a casual gamer. I still don't think casual gamers play Bejeweled all day long - I think they want to be able to play every game everyone else does. PoP lets you do that. If "hardcore gamers" want something else to do with the game, they can track down all 1,001 light-thingys. Me, I just want to play.

And BY ORMAZD - I get to. Prince of Persia may be the first full-on disc-based game that I will beat since... Resident Evil?

LASTLY - I downloaded and beat Portal. That was effing awesome.

2008-12-04T20:26:00.002-05:00

POINTS!

I can't live without points. I don't know if it's a penny a point or if it's .0125 pennies per point. All I buy are points. I need points. How am I supposed to get my fill without points??

I've spent points on everything... Puzzle Fighter, Tetris, Pac-Man, Geometry Wars... I've played them all before - but now I've bought them with points!

POINTS!!!!

2008-12-02T18:24:00.000-05:00

Dear LIPS,

Remember that time I said I didn't need you? That I didn't love you? I'm so sorry. I was drunk and I didn't mean it. Please forgive me.

Wow that was easy.

Love,

Fladam

2008-11-30T18:42:00.001-05:00

I just played LIPS for 360. It's the last time I'll play LIPS.

The game is absolutely horrible. They're trying to appeal to a casual gamer, and it took me (admittedly, someone who usually knows what they're doing) way too long to get into the game.

I even downloaded a song for it --- that I could never find.

Don't buy it. Don't play it. It's going right back to the store. I don't know WHY I didn't just go with Rock Band 2.

2008-11-26T19:30:00.001-05:00

2008-11-25T20:50:00.000-05:00

I'm thankful for Burnout Revenge.

I'm thankful for World of Goo.

I'm thankful for Tecmo Bowl Kickoff.

Thanksgaming.

2008-11-22T20:33:00.000-05:00

Ticket to Ride is AWESOME.

Playing with Mindy and Vinny and Peter and Jess?

AWESOMER.

2008-11-19T15:38:00.002-05:00

So, I got a 360. It's been a long time coming, and I have a lot catching up to do. It was due time.

I spent the last four days trying to maneuver through the interface... getting used to the buttons and controller, trying out games, etc.

Then today, the bastards unleashed the NEW XBOX Experience on me.

I don't hate it, but I really don't love it. The avatars are a nice add-on, but... you know... I've got a Mii already. Plus, I've opened the disc tray like seven times already. Why the hell is that the first option??

Anywho, it'll take some getting used to. But with a headset and a stack of friends to play with, I'm sure I'll make it through.

P.S. Wii, I still love you.

2008-11-15T09:10:00.002-05:00

And then everything was fine... for now.

2008-11-11T21:17:00.003-05:00

Okay. No, seriously. Wii Music is awesome. I smiled while playing the game... for about an hour I was smiling.

There's something inherently innocent about the game. You don't have to think, you just have to have an imagination. Imagine...

There's so much power in the game - and it has gone horribly unnoticed.

Hurrah for Wii Music, I say. It's pure, spur-of-the-moment, honest, simple - while lovingly produced - imaginative, do-it-yourself, happy, Mii-enhanced, Nintendo produced, flailing fun. FUN.

Do you hear me? Fun. FUN!

The word has lost all meaning.

2008-11-10T18:44:00.001-05:00

I'm sure glad I grew a brain and realized that this all goes down on WEDNESDAY.

Not Tuesday, Wednesday.

UGH.

2008-11-08T10:10:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow is the day. Actually, Tuesday is THE day, but tomorrow is a day.

2008-11-04T23:13:00.002-05:00

We did it. He did it.

GOOOOOOBAMA!

2008-11-04T18:24:00.000-05:00

I'm totally invested. I'm more than ready. I'm incredibly anxious.

LET'S DO THIS. ELECTION '08 FTW!!!

2008-11-03T20:28:00.001-05:00

For the love of Bejesus VOTE VOTE VOTE.

I've been looking forward to 11/4 for a very long time.

GET OUT THE VOTE.

VOTE!!!

2008-11-01T02:33:00.001-05:00

Happy Birthday, Jeff.

2008-10-29T18:26:00.001-05:00

I'm feeling so anxious lately. There are so many big things coming up.

I don't really know what scares me most.

2008-10-27T20:08:00.000-05:00

McCain couldn't win a fishing contest if he were the only one with a pole.

Seriously.

I would do Rachel Maddow. Well, maybe not DO her... but I'd pick her brain, gosh darnit.

2008-10-24T17:41:00.003-05:00

Wow. This week flew by. It's been so busy at work...

Let's hope next week flies by also - as it creeps closer and closer to the FOURTH.

2008-10-15T17:54:00.001-05:00

Jack Narz passed away today.

And so it goes...

2008-10-14T20:10:00.003-05:00

I forgive you, Britney. I forgive you.

2008-10-13T18:43:00.004-05:00

Did you hear the news? Everyone's talking about it. Jessica Simpson's boyfriend broke his pinky.

You know, that really sucks. For her. I mean, she's trying to revive her career by going country - and everything is going super until this. What is she suppose to do now? How will she hear him clap at concerts? How will they hold hands??

This is just too much for her.

On a completely unrelated note, my undefeated Giants are on MNF tonight. Yay BOOMER!

2008-10-12T14:14:00.002-05:00

I think the presidential candidates are incredibly influential; the potential reach of their messages is enormous.

That's why, sometimes, when someone you know has a differing opinion about politics than you do, its best to give them the benefit of the doubt.

And then sometimes, that same someone spells out "Your welcome" - and you realize it's not the candidate's fault. That someone is just plain stupid.

2008-10-11T21:35:00.000-05:00

Rick Astley is HOT. Never gonna give you up!

2008-10-08T18:06:00.002-05:00

That one? THAT ONE?

For Christ's sake, McCain won't even LOOK at Barack.